Part II: Ballsy Blue

As I mentioned, Jackie and Blue felt drawn to each other and they felt they owed it to themselves to try and figure it out. Of course, this crushed Betty, when in reality, she’s just jealous that Blue seems to like Jackie more then he liked her when she’s the one who’s totally sprung on him. Blue and Jackie have since started talking and getting to know each other more intimately.

I’m skeptical of Blue, very skeptical. My gut instinct is telling me he’s a player, he stalks out single women to play with on the side (remember he has a live-in girlfriend). He’s been in the swinging scene for 20+ years, most of that with his ex-wife. Now they’re divorced. He met his current girlfriend through the swing lifestyle as well but she has since decided she doesn’t want to swing anymore. How in the world she thinks she can take a seasoned swinger such as himself and force him into a monogamous relationship basically is beyond me. If he willingly gave it up, that’s one thing, but forcing him to be mono, not going to happen. And then be crushed to discover he’s playing around on the side? However, these are no excuses for him. He decided to move in with her, he’s stayed with her so he’s being just plain dishonest.

Betty turned their 5-week affair into a 3-month relationship where she claims she was his girl and he says she wasn’t. In that 5-week span, they went to a popular swing club that Blue has a membership to a number of times and played there, of course. Before the night that involved Jackie, there was another incident that she flipped out about. Apparently they were messing around at the club and another couple came into the room and started messing around as well. However he got the signal or permission, Blue went over to the other lady and started going down on her. Betty claims he totally got up and abandoned her, Blue claims he tried to take her with him but she refused and hung back so he went ahead because, again,  no word from her. No indication that she wasn’t comfortable with it. Betty ended up gathering her things together and storming out after slamming doors and throwing his stuff around, so the story goes. She’s too jealous, possessive, and insecure to be swinging with someone she has developed feelings for.

I don’t know what he does to these women. Both Betty and Jackie have said the same thing. There’s just something about him. He’s so calm and easy to be around blah blah blah. When he’s with them, he’s funny, charming and showers them with attention. When they’re not together, he’s almost silent, uncommunicative and short. His texts are barely worth reading. I know this because both Betty and Jackie have shown me conversations with him. I’ve also told them both that if that were me, I’d be long gone. I need way more attention and communication that he gives. I cannot stand the crazy short answers and lack of affection. Something else about all this….the  man has two phones. This is how far he’s gone to conceal his affairs. Betty used to call his second phone, the Batphone, because when he’s home or with his girlfriend, the Batphone is off and hidden away. We know this because on Kik, if the receiver’s phone is off, when messages are sent, they will simply say “s” for sent. But if the phone is on, it will say “d” for delivered and of course “r” for read. The only sort of communication he keeps up when the Batphone is off is email that he keeps on his regular phone.

Papa and I finally met him, with Jackie (more to come surrounding all that in Part III). Blue is charming, he has great eyes and a nice smile but I still don’t see how these women have fallen so hard for him. Again, my instinct is telling me different. He tells Jackie he loves her, wants to be with her, showers her with all this love and affection in person but as soon as they’re apart, it goes back to the short answers and nearly non-existent communication. It’s starting to wear on Jackie a little bit. She needs affection, attention and communication and he’s just not providing it. Even after she told him in person she needed more from him and he promised and said he would make the effort. Now since we have met him, he’s been texting Papa and me on the side. Jackie is aware of all this. There are times when he will be texting me and not Jackie. That bothers me. If he’s so infatuated with her, shouldn’t he be making more of an effort to chat with her, let her know he’s thinking about her and not chatting it up with me? She’s asked and I’ve been honest, telling her what time he’s sent me messages, when the last message I’ve gotten was, etc etc. I know it upsets her, I can feel it. It would upset me too. She’s asked me if I think she’s being too over-emotional and I honestly answered, NO. In fact, Jackie is being calmer than I would be. The conversations between Blue and I have been mostly about Betty, he’s apologized a number of times for her actions and I keep telling him, he has nothing to apologize for. It was her actions, her insanity. Yes, it’s surrounding him but in the end, it’s her who went cuckoo. The other part that bothers me is the conversations between him and I have been longer and fuller than with Jackie. I get whole sentences and paragraphs, while she gets emojis and a few words at a time. He also mentioned last night that he went to buy Jackie and me a toy at the sex store he frequents. He did the exact thing with Betty, which is also a red flag for me because the pattern is surfacing. Being in the lifestyle for so long, we think he’s trying to set up for a foursome, which neither of us are even remotely interested in. Is he looking at Jackie as a long-term commitment or just another playmate to stay in the life?

We have both been honest with Jackie, trying to help her along in her struggle with Blue. He’s promised her that he will be moving out of his girlfriend’s house at the end of summer. No other specific date, just the end of summer. Do I believe that? Mostly no. I think he tells a lot of stories. He is charming and very talkative in person with a lot of great stories between his adventure-filled work he has now retired from and all the years swinging (again, another red flag because he is not the same in text as he is in person). Upon meeting him, we all went to dinner together. At the diner, he ran into a guy who works with his girlfriend who was also out to dinner with a gentleman that used to work with his father. Blue was sweating buckets. He disappeared from our table for a short time while he chatted with that other group. When he came back, he was sweaty and obviously nervous. Except Jackie couldn’t quite nail down an answer from him who he was more nervous about, the dude that worked with his girlfriend or the guy who knew his dad. He blew off the question about whether his dad knew of the troubles between his girlfriend and him, though he did answer it the second time Jackie asked. It still didn’t feel truthful. When someone says, “oh yea yea yea he knows” and quickly follows it up with another sentence to distract, it’s yet another flag.

Both of us are becoming protective of Jackie. My feelings are telling me her and Blue are headed for a disaster and I honestly don’t know how to feel about that because we kind of want her for ourselves..


Part 1: Nutty Betty

A lot has happened in the last month since the foursome. Betty and Jackie have essentially parted ways. We are no longer seeing Betty but are now seeing Jackie. Betty has gone off the deep end. Blue and Betty are no longer seeing each other but Jackie has admitted to developing feelings for Blue…

Let’s back up to the night before the foursome where Betty, Jackie and Blue got together and Betty had a total meltdown. Jackie and Blue kissed upon meeting and Jackie said she felt a spark, a connection between the two of them. Betty kept saying she felt it was because Jackie was the shiny new toy and Blue was way more interested in playing with the new toy than her. From Jackie’s perspective, he may have paid her a little more attention than he should have but Betty also failed to 1. say anything at all 2. say the safe word that Blue and her had agreed upon 3. she just got up and left without saying anything so the whole night was just a total fucking bust. The next night, Betty and Jackie hooked up with us. It was a great night, everything seemed fine, everyone went home and to bed happy and satisfied. The next day, all hell broke loose…

However the conversation started, whoever asked the questions or offered up the admission but Jackie admitted to feeling something for Blue. Up until the night of the foursome, Betty had not really admitted to anyone that she might have feelings for Blue until Papa kind of cornered her. She still tried to deny it but got the eyebrows look until she did. Maybe that was the moment Betty actually admitted it to herself as well. Papa and I had known it for a while now, even if she didn’t. This is where it goes a little crazy… Apparently, Betty considered the hook-ups with Blue dates. She believed she was dating him so when Jackie admitted to having feelings for Blue as well, the shit hit the fan. Betty went batshit crazy. All of a sudden it turned into Jackie stealing Betty’s boyfriend and Betty being absolutely crushed over the whole thing. Betty and Blue were not boyfriend/girlfriend. They weren’t even dating. They were fucking. FUCKING. He’s a swinger. A fucking swinger who plays with women behind his ACTUAL girlfriend’s back. That’s right, he has a girlfriend, a live-in girlfriend. At this point, Papa and I start talking to Jackie on our own and we actually find out some interesting things about Betty. It turns out Betty tells half-truths. She tells the version of the story that completely leaves out where she was a part of the problem. Betty is great at making herself out to be the victim. I cannot stress enough how crazy and dramatic this situation has been blown into by Betty. Hours and hours spent texting and talking about how betrayed she feels by Jackie. Hours and hours and hours. This is not an exaggeration. I have tried my best to remain neutral but the more she harped on how Jackie stole her boyfriend and the only thing she can do is step aside and let them be happy, the more I’ve pulled away from her and my responses have gotten less supportive.

To sum up some of the insanity: Betty stalked Blue on Facebook, threatened to message his girlfriend and tell her all about the affair. It was just a threat, but still. Five weeks of talking to/knowing/fucking Blue have now turned into a three-month relationship. Blue went over to Betty’s place to settle everything down, hash it out, say their good-byes and tell her he was sorry that it ended how it did. Betty claims they fucked. Blue denies it, saying he couldn’t get it up (still an admission of he TRIED). At one point, Betty told Jackie that he couldn’t get hard as well but then came back and told me days later again that they did have sex. It’s a total he said/she said situation. The kicker that finally broke me was the other morning I woke up to a text from Betty saying she emailed Blue that she was going to mail him his shit. Again, a threat to make sure his girlfriend would find out. Now, to fully understand how insane this is, this was days after she had seemingly gone quiet and kept claiming she was doing better, getting over all this crap and moving on. I finally wrote her a long text essentially telling her this has got to stop in as nice a way as I could.

Remember when Alisha Silverstone was big in the early 90s? She did a movie with Cary Elwes where her parents were pretty well off and renting an apartment over their garage. She’s a teenager who develops a mad crush on him. It seems kind of innocent at first until it gets creepier and creepier. She makes advances on him, gets insanely jealous of his new girlfriend and tries to get her killed, fakes being raped by him, etc etc. Betty kind of reminds me of that movie. This made-up relationship between the teacher and the teenage girl in her head drives her do crazy things. Though I’m not entirely sure Betty is that extreme (HOPE NOT) but not too many shades away, really.

Truthfully, we have never encountered a unicorn with so much drama. Drama, drama, drama. It’s been exhausting. After that text that I sent her, it’s been quiet. Blissfully quiet. Though I’m still a little nervous about that.


The Unicorn I wrote about in A *Real* Unicorn has since visited us 5….6…times? Something like that, and I have become quite fond of her. We play well together, the chemistry is good and she’s very fun in bed. I did work on my bullshit and it has worked out very well since then . A little background on her…

She’s 46, divorced with a grown child who doesn’t live with her. She works full time to support herself and also has a side business where she bakes. Therefore we shall officially name her Betty. We met Betty in our second go-around in the swingers chat. Papa started messaging her and I told Him I thought she was with someone. Turns out she was, kinda.  They were FWB. He’s married and they have been seeing each other for a couple of years. Papa was like, well, she said she plays on her own…so we continued the chat. A few days later, we met. I freaked, calmed down and she came back a couple days after that and we played again. It took to the 3rd play session for me to really relax and enjoy myself and once that happened, it’s been amazing ever since. Betty is very bi, a little submissive but giving and lots of fun. Being in the chat, she has also met another guy. In the midst of all that, her original FWB has since put two and two together and figured out she’s met her other fellow and us and totally bailed on her. They had never had any agreement on this, not to mention again that he’s fucking married, so it’s a little messed up. At first, Betty was agitated and I think a little butt hurt but has moved past it pretty quickly.  Especially since she has enough to play around with anyway. In the beginning she did mention that she has a past with one of her cousins. Before anyone really judges, this cousin is by marriage, not blood! They have had some interesting nights together.  Oh, and I should mention here that the cousin is also a woman. Let’s call her Jackie, since she’s a nurse. The other gentleman that Betty has recently met is a seasoned swinger who has a live-in girlfriend whom he met through swinging but has since stopped swinging. He cannot stop….and unfortunately does his own thing on the side. Betty tries to keep her emotions in check when it comes to him but it’s hard. She definitely has a thing for him and even proposed having a foursome with us but we have left that one alone because of her feelings for him. 

A week or so ago, Betty mentioned that Jackie was coming to visit her. Jackie lives about 4 hours north of us. I sort of kidded around saying she should bring Jackie over to meet us. Betty didn’t say much about it and I let it go,  thinking they had plans or what-not. Well, the weekend comes and Jackie is here. That Friday,  Papa and I met up with some of our platonic friends for snacks and drinks and to socialize. It was a nice adult evening. Then Saturday comes around. It’s a relaxed day, even though Papa worked through half of it. I did laundry and lounged around while talking to Betty off and on. She was a little short and not her talkative bubbly self but we chalked it up to Jackie being with her. As the day wore on, it came up that they didn’t have much to do so Papa and I invited them to our house. He would cook and Betty would make dessert. Perfect. 

Betty and Jackie come over. Instant attraction. We got out drinks and started chatting. The four of us got along very well. Jackie fit right in. There was a lot of flirting, swapping swinging stories, laughing, A LOT of laughing. Papa and I had no idea what they had been up to the night before. Well, it starts to come out in bits and pieces. Eventually Papa just straight asks Betty what went on. So it unfolds..

They met up with the man that Betty has been kind of casually seeing but has developed feelings for. Since he’s a retired cop, we can call him Blue. Apparently they went to the local swinger club where he has a membership and has taken Betty there already a couple of times. Long story short, they start messing around, all three of them but Betty ends up feeling left out. She said Blue ended up in the middle and paying most of his attention to Jackie and she felt like she didn’t even need to be there, that he didn’t care if she was there or not, so she stormed out. Jackie said she even noticed it, it wasn’t all in Betty’s head. Jackie felt like she had to direct more of Blue’s attention to Betty since he wasn’t dividing it well. Betty drove so, as one can imagine, the ride home was not too comfortable. She refused to talk to Blue about any of it but he refused to admit even if he wasn’t in the wrong, that she ended up feeling that way.  It just ended up being a bad night. 

I learned later that Papa went ahead and asked Jackie if she was down to play while Betty and I were in the kitchen, which is why I got the thumbs up or down question a little while later in the evening. That surprised me, considering what had transpired the night before but who was I to argue. It was kind of a slow start with Papa at Jackie’s feet and me with Betty. But once it did…

Jackie and Papa started making out while Betty and I did the same, removing articles of clothing as well. Jackie had on a strapless summer dress that never came off,  just slipped off the appropriate areas for access. As Betty and I were starting to get a little hot and heavy, Papa suggested we switch so I could have some time with our newest friend. The rest of my clothes came off as I ventured over to her and Papa joined up with Betty. Jackie’s kisses were amazing. Sweet and soft yet slightly aggressive. Seeing as this was my one biggest fantasy, which amazingly now included my Husband since all us girls were bisexual,  I was already turned on but Jackie’s kisses and touches pushed it even further.  I had to taste her. She laid back on the couch as I spread her legs apart and eagerly dived into her sweet, wet pussy. I could hear Betty moaning as Papa was eating her out at the same time. Another huge turn on. Who would have imagined this happening? I heard Betty coming loudly and shortly after Papa was up on the couch with His cock in Jackie’s mouth when I felt Betty’s fingers start to play with my own pussy. I let Papa take over as Betty pushed me back on the other side of the couch, telling me it was my turn. Who am I to say no? Betty went down on me, her soft and gentle pussy eating familiar and very pleasurable. Across the way, Papa’s head was between Jackie’s legs at the same time. It wasn’t long before Betty had gotten me to come more than a couple of times and then somehow, Jackie had come over to me and firmly planted herself between my legs as well. Betty was on the couch with me so I started fingering her at the same time. Papa made His way to behind Jackie and slid His cock into her. What a sight that was. The thrusting motion of Papa into Jackie and Jackie’s tongue in my pussy brought on more orgasmic waves as my fingers rubbed Betty’s soft and wet insides. With all that, came the end of the night. At least the sex part. 

Jackie ended up back on the other side of the couch from me and Papa next to her.  I was feeling amazing, happy and comfortable which led me to snuggling up with Betty. Papa said that was actually His favorite part of the whole night. Seeing me comfortable enough to cuddle with Betty while He was cuddled up with Jackie. There were no twinges, no bad feelings at all. It was an absolutely amazing evening, something that not many people, even those who have been in the lifestyle for many years, get to experience. As I said, amazing!

I Can’t Make This Stuff Up, Part 2

Since the truck has been out of commission, That means the kids have not been up to see Stripe Sr. She is three and a half hours north of us. Of course, even before the car trouble Stripe had said they had been to her mom’s quite enough lately. Funny how Red gets a job and suddenly they don’t need to go visit Stripe Sr. so much. Oh could that possibly be because the funds have been cut off?  Just a theory. In all of this, the kids have been asking about Senior.  They are missing her and we have noticed. Papa came to me the other morning and asked about graduation. He thought maybe it would be a good time to try getting everyone together for the sake of the kids. My immediate response was less than thrilled but hesitantly agreed, of course thinking of the kids. As the day progressed I thought more and more about it and I became a little anxious and then had to think about why I was getting anxious.

Red and I have a complicated past as we had a rocky marriage, especially after the arrival of the kids. Between his secrets, my suspicions of his lies and cheating, the spotty employment history and stress, I have many many issues with him. Not even to begin bringing up his narcissism, lack of apology or even taking responsibility for his actions, emotional abuse and just making me feel insane most of the time. All of that combined means I need to stay away from him. I keep our communication as bare as possible and avoid in-person and phone interaction. Texting is the best so that if issues come up,  I have a chance to keep my calm and respond appropriately versus getting emotional and not being able to hold my tongue,  which just leads to fights. Like I said, complicated.

Over dinner, my mom and Papa were discussing it again and I said I wasn’t too happy about it but I’m sure I can make it through. My mom and Papa will be here and that makes me feel better. Papa said something to the effect that, oh you’re just not ready but you’ll be fine. Yes agreed…but so much more was dismissed, I felt, and like I was overreacting. Later that night, Papa asked what was wrong and I told Him when Him and Stripe are on decent terms, He seems to forget just how much more complicated my past with Red is than theirs. They just weren’t compatible. Yes, there was some hurt and arguing but they seem to be in a decent place now whereas I can’t trust Red for anything and just about any issue that shouldn’t be an issue turns into an issue. He either argues and fights me or simply doesn’t do what he’s supposed to do and then turns it around on me. Every little thing is a battle with him which is why I avoid as much contact with him as possible. I explained that being out and having to share the times or moments that involve the kids with him is fine,  I can do that. I’m fine enough to be on neutral ground around him. But inviting him into my home is another story entirely. This is my home, my safe place. I share my life and my kids with my Husband here. Having Red come into my home feels invasive. I don’t like it. I don’t want him in my safe place. But it’s too late. The invited have been sent and the RSVPs received.  They are coming.  HE is coming. Papa said He was sorry for not giving me enough time to process this and just going with it. He didn’t like hearing I felt dismissed but in the end, I was able to talk to Him and that’s important. For me, for Him and especially our marriage. Communication is so very important. I said I’m not mad, I said I will be fine. Not jumping for joy but fine. But I also made it clear that in the future, I don’t want to share my holidays or very many parties with Red.  I don’t want my memories to be of him there and me having to calm my anxiety about him being there. I want to be happy and carefree and enjoy my time with my family. I can’t do that with Red there.  I couldn’t even do it when we were married because I was always on edge, worried about what I said, what I did or how I was going to be verbally or emotionaly punished later for not giving him enough attention or catering to his needs. 

I’ve had enough time to talk myself down. Papa has repeatedly told me just stick by Him or my mom and avoid being near Red. I know….it’ll be ok….it’ll be ok….it’ll be ok….

I Can’t Make This Stuff Up – Part 1

Wow….it’s been forever! A lot to catch up on.

Let’s start with the family stuff. We are going on week 7 of having the kids. Normally our schedule is one week on, one off.  Red got a job (FUCKING FINALLY) that required him to be out of state for training.  He agreed to letting me have the blondies that week while Stripe kept the brownies. Week 1 was our week, week 2 was blondies and then week 3 ours again….then the car trouble hit. Red was home for 2 days and sent back out for training, supposedly. This was the week before Mother’s day. Her car barely started up that Monday. She let Papa know what was going on and we decided to go ahead and take the kids the next day to make sure they would get back and forth to school. We heard through the kids that there wasn’t much food in their house anyway so we were happy they were with us. The week goes by and Papa checks to see if she is still planning on having the brownies for Mother’s day, He also asked about the food situation. Stripe confessed she did want the kids but there wasn’t much to eat. This entire time, Red is out of town and she’s stuck with a truck that doesn’t work and a car she cannot drive because it’s a manual. Papa does the right thing and buys her groceries for the weekend so that she can spend her mother’s day with all 3 of her kids. In the meantime, her mom comes down and buys her a battery (I forgot to throw in there that they couldn’t afford one this whole time, that his check got messed up….as if I hadn’t heard that 300 times when Red and I were together) because that’s what they’re figuring is wrong with it. Neither of them can get the old one out to test the new one. Next day Papa goes over to see….He gets the new battery in and still nothing. Truck doesn’t start. It’s not the battery.

That week passes and we once again have the kids, because, you know…their truck. After 4 weeks of training in North Carolina, Red finally comes home. Stripe calls my parents (MY PARENTS) to pick his sorry ass up at the airport (we’re all guessing they’re so broke at this point they can’t afford an Uber from the airport). This was the second call to my parents. The first being Mother’s day weekend, Red had the brass balls to call my parents asking if they could take Stripe to get a battery for the truck. Mom and I both knew that was code for my parents footing the bill. I was slightly livid at that one. Like I said…brass balls that one has. So he’s back….and still no truck. Next week is the last week of school and Red told me we might as well figure on keeping the kids through Thursday because they have to get the truck towed into a shop and figure out how to fix it. Stripe admitted to Papa that she intends on asking her mom to help fix the truck, the same woman who has been supporting them since last November but swears she’s done doing that. Wait a minute….didn’t Red mention to my parents on that glorious ride from the airport that he’s making $31/hour? Sure…and he’s also selling this lovely bridge in London. :sigh:

This entire time we have been utterly flabbergasted by how neither of them have seemed bothered by not having 5 of their kids around for so many weeks but just a weekend thrown in on ocassion. Hardly a mention of how much they miss them or even questioning whether we can shuttle them back and forth on their weeks. They just too willingly gave up their kids for nearly the past 2 months. I think she’s been looking at this as a vacation.  Yes she still has a 16-month old at home but that’s still 5 less kids to deal with! Not to mention that we have had to make the arrangements to drop the kids off to them on weekends and no push back about taking them back on Memorial day when there was no school.  For two people who swear these kids are their life,  it’s been eerily quiet and uncontested. 

Whatever the case is, only time will tell. It’ll be interesting to see if her mom stands by her word or gives in to fix their truck.