Well here we are folks! 7-0… ummm… well alrighty then.
I had counseled Baby Doll that the next time Red confronted her with being happier with me than with him that she go ahead and tell him, that, at least for now she was. And that she knew he was happier with Kitty than with herself. So, she did…but he pretty much lost his mind! In my best estimation, the biggest problem with my brother Red is his inability or lack of willingness to really do some serious self-reflection. It is a hard thing to admit to yourself, much less your spouse that you treat your SO better and that you are happier with the SO! But, if we can be honest with ourselves and with each other, so much of the other bullshit will be dropped. As expectations of what the role of a spouse is supposed to be change with the changing of who is a spouse and who is an SO (or new spouse :)) the jealousies and possessiveness should hopefully wane.
Baby Doll and Red went at it, but good. They have always admitted to fighting dirty and this has been no exception. I hate fighting dirty! I have always been told and taught that the only way to maintain a healthy relationship is to fight, but fight clean. Words matter. And once said they can’t be unsaid! Kitty had been laying the groundwork for about a week to get us all to 6-1, but with the couple of days of fighting she insisted to Red that we go to 7-0 at least for a while. Baby Doll and Red just need space!
So just like that, in a little over a month, we have moved in, the new spouses moved in together, and now we are at 7-0…for how long is the next question. The result… Kitty has never been happier! She has been struggling with letting me go, as we had already admitted to each other that we were better off with the new spouses. She is also the stay at home Mom of our quad and has been struggling with figuring out how to do that, combined with not sleeping, and me and her fighting, she has been a bit of a disaster. Combine all of those factors with now she gets 100% of Red, I think shes’s happy, even if it means getting only 1-2% of me. Red seems to be happier too… although, he’s a bit of an enigma to me, so I’m not really sure. Baby Doll is still struggling a little I think. She’s been sick, and feeling guilty about the fighting even though she is hurt too. But I think she will come through this realizing that it is for the best. As for me… I have my Baby Doll! The selfish D side of myself is happy I don’t have to share any more, and send her away two days a week. The poly boyfriend side of me worries if I can make her happy 24/7…its only been 6 months…
So, for now, it’s 7-0. The next twist, the next chapter, the next stage of this journey… let’s make it a good one!!!